Saturday 5 May 2007

ADELE!! thanks for the tip, haha. quentin and i shall drag ian out for interaction on tuesdays at suppertime then.

today i made an investment for the future, it was all of $13.55. since the turtle's been so garang-ly practising piano, i decided i might as well join him, and attempt to earn back all the money my parents spent on piano lessons for almost 12 years of my life - i finally cleared grade 8 in j2. i decided that i would attempt to practise to become "able-to-perform," i.e. sing and play at the same time. not "performance-standard" as such, but "able-to-perform". christmas songs and the like, you know? then i can actually attempt to get gigs over christmas (as if it's that easy).

so, i bought a manuscript book and a chord book - a chord dictionary, rather, with all the chords you'll ever need - supposedly. on retrospect i probably could have found something like that online and printed it out for a fraction of the price, but oh well. i'm quite inept, really, and quite messy, so i don't think it's such a bad thing that i've actually got chords CONSOLIDATED, and not on loose sheets of paper. i'm going to write lead sheets for myself - stop pooh-poohing, i already admitted i was inept, i need to see the notes, especially since all these christmas songs have rather complicated chords. now i've got the sounds, i've got to figure out what i'm going to do with them. if i even have enough time to, i start interning next week.

***
i've been wanting to share about chinese new year for the longest time - well, seeing as it was in february, it's obviously been a long time. sharing with pictures and all, but i realised they're all on my dad's laptop and i'm too lazy to go transfer them to my computer. but it was just a lot about how i appreciate my family very much and love them even more, and how i realised what the meaning of true love is - i think. i took pictures of my maternal grandparents, and my paternal grandmother's best friend and her husband which i wanted to put up, because they're really lovely people. in all senses of the word "lovely."

take my maternal grandparents. my grandfather had a stroke when i was around nine or ten, and my grandmother's been taking care of him ever since. she complains now and then, but she's remained faithfully by his side, accompanies him to all his physiotherapy sessions, cooks his meals, supports him when he walks - which is no joke, because he walks extremely slowly now. my mother told me the other day that after his heart bypass surgery, my grandmother arrived at the hospital every day when visiting hours began (she cooked nourishing food for him as well, i think) and left only when visiting hours ended. every single day. and the doctor commented to my mother that it was impossible to find dedication of this sort in young people nowadays.

my mother always says my (our?) generation can't take pain - we give up on our relationships easily, but in the past you got married and that was it, you had to make it work. no nonsense about finding true love after marriage with someone else, or having "irreconciliable differences" and getting a divorce - divorces were shameful things in those days. even when our parents' generation dated - i suppose they were just as unsure as humans beings will always, always be - but they knew that they were dating to see if it would one day be for keeps. relationships meant more than just holding someone's hand, or having that person ferry you around to various places.

then there's my paternal grandmother's best friend. her husband's diabetes worsened drastically recently, and he's now dependent on her for everything. she complains about it, but she still does everything for him anyway. if you think about the marriage vows, there's actually nothing very surprising about all this, because it's what you pledge to do when you get married. in sickness and health, for richer or poorer, better or worse, till death do you part. honestly though, i think such dedication, such unconditional love, really - it's surprising today, because we're too used to putting ourselves before others.

the both of them still wear their wedding rings, by the way. he, frail and thin now; wasted hands with skin turned baby-smooth, which once used to be rough and callused, carried me when i was a baby. her dark-skinned wrinkled hands, agile fingers kept busy with various craft-work as she sits in the living room with him day after day, surviving with him as the tv blares in the background - he can barely talk now. and on both their left fourth fingers, a circle of silver.

***
on that note, i'd like to think that God's teaching me each day what it means to love unconditionally, and that He's helping me to do so. oh, for old-fashionedness.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hi Chloe; my wife and I were ministered by your singing of Amazing Grace at the service just now. God bless.:) - CY