Last Week

1. I found out that D, who attended Chinese schools for most of his school life, save for university, could not remember how to write 责任 (ze2 ren4) - which means responsibility. You can draw whatever inferences you like from that.

2. I burst a big pimple on my chin while standing in the queue to enter Butter Factory - what's more, it was my first time there. What a way to mark the occasion.

Much Good Part 3, and Exchange of the Week

I've been having some serious issues with Microsoft Word this past week - and I mean serious.

***
D: Hey I sent you already - I didn't change much of it, I just made it so the descriptions at the top of the table appear at the top of every page of the table.

Me: Wow! How do you do that? Can you tell me so I can do it, cause I was editing one version before you sent me this one and I don't want to have re-edit the thing.

D: Just press F1!

Me (suspiciously): Really? Don't bluff me! Or I'll be very sad.

D: Yes yes! Just press F1! Really!

Me: Ok! I'm going to do it now! (proceeds to press F1)

AND. . .

The Microsoft Word HELP dialog box appears on the screen.

D took enough pity on me in the end to tell me how to do it though.

Lenny runs Word 2007 and I'm having difficulties figuring out how to do it on that (so I can impart this useful knowledge to you, in case you didn't know how to). Our office computers run Word 2003, and I think it's one of the options under Tools but I'm not sure.

If you aren't either, and you desperately need to know - just press F1.

Lessons Learnt

Channel 8 seems to have learnt its lesson after The Little Nyonya - I tuned in to Together just now, and caught what must be Channel 8's cheesiest proposal scene ever.

But at least I had the satisfaction of seeing Jeanette Aw and Dai Yang Tian happy. Rumour has it that this happiness doesn't last till the end of the show though - fingers crossed! Come on Channel 8, you must have learnt your lesson already.

If you didn't watch it, Too Bad. I'm currently watching America's Got Talent with my mother and we're slamming the contestants. Not their performances, but their fakey pre-performance videos, complete with brave blinking away of tears from clear blue/green eyes.

The news of the night is that they've (whoever they are) remixed the London Choco Roll song! They've gotten rid of that weird gymnast ribbon act that accompanied it, and it's been replaced with happy family scenes.

Looks like Channel 8's not the only one who's learnt its lesson.

Happy New Year!

Parts of the world are currently in chaos.

But right here in this good ol' "prime residential area" (I'm being sarcastic here!), that's not actually in the middle of Singapore, some Very Cheeky Monkeys decided to hotfoot it over and clamber over my neighbours' gates, fences and rooftops just for fun.

One of my neighbours decided that he didn't mind standing practically in the middle of our street waving his (Rather Expensive Looking) golf club at them.

And making very loud PSHAW and PSHOO noises at the same time.

I wonder what he does for a living, his house is pretty big.

Also, I got conned by two fat boys selling Magnolia ice-cream door to door, ostensibly to help their ailing, cancer-stricken mother.

Well, I'm not sure I really got conned - isn't it awful to lie about your very own mother being ailing and cancer-stricken?

Everyone in my family made fun of me though. PoBe's comments took the cake:

YOU GULLIBLE CLOWN!

You're mad, i swear, too nice already.

HOW TO BE LAWYER LIKE THAT?!

I was touched, though, when my father specially came up to me after we got home from dinner to tell me not to become cynical.

Happy New Year, from the monkeys and me and the two fat con-boys.

Reflections
(Ugh, what a maudlin title)

Watching Jon and his friends - lawyers (to be), accountants, traders etc. - scoff potato chips by the fistful like a bunch of pre-pubescent boys just after we counted down to 2010 looks set to become a cherished memory, just about on par with the time B and I scarfed down leftover Bakerzin blueberry cheesecake with reckless abandon a little too late at night.

I didn't eat any potato chips, oh no! Which gave me a Pleasantly Virtuous And Smug Feeling.

I have also decided that peer pressure hits harder as you grow older, but there aren't any "Beware of Peer Pressure" talks for adults because that's like, you know, such a teenage thing to have to deal with? And we're like, all adults now, right?

The legal profession is an extremely humbling one. There are so many things to learn all the time, so many possibilities to consider. And contrary to popular belief, the majority of senior lawyers actually work really hard. So I'd appreciate it if you did away with the bad lawyer jokes and stereotypes in 2010. Not that The Pupil's going to be much help. Sometimes I wish Channel 5 would stop making such asses of u and me (there goes the "assume" joke, in case you didn't realise).

Awaiting the results of the Dawson ballot with bated breath! Please join Jon and myself in praying every night that we'll get a flat - and that N and J will too, so at least we can be sure of at least one set of lovely neighbours.

***
I leave you with a profound piece of literature to start the New Year:

"Ow!" cried Pooh. "You're hurting!"

"The fact is," said Rabbit, "you're stuck."

"It all comes," said Pooh crossly, "of not having front doors big enough."

"It all comes," said Rabbit sternly, "of eating too much. I thought at the time," said Rabbit, "only I didn't like to say anything," said Rabbit, "that one of us was eating too much," said Rabbit, "and I knew it wasn't me," he said.

- Winnie the Pooh, A.A. Milne