#wfhdiaries: Days 33-37

When you can’t get your kids out of your hair:

Courtesy of the cover of The Economist, 30 April issue (The 90% economy)

This was actually Andrew’s class’ craft, 快乐的理发师 (Happy Hairdresser!), but Daniel asked to do one too. The boys’ end products are below. No prizes for guessing who created the above.

I see someone tried to wash the glue out of your hair. My, what large teeth you have!

Daniel’s class is embarking on learning 量词. To the question 小朋友们，你们家有几辆车呢？, I heard someone say FIVE! Daniel was momentarily flummoxed – I popped out of the study to check on him when I didn’t hear him joining in the chorus of responses, and came upon him staring at the screen askance. But Mummy, I have Lightning McQueen and Jackson Storm and all these other small cars, how do I count how many cars I have at home?

Jon also had some craft work. Imagine my ire when he realised he was supposed to contribute “L” instead of “A”. Waste rough paper only.

As you know, I made Taiwanese oyster meesua last week to celebrate the super nice thing that happened to Jon at work. But in the ultimate act of spousal betrayal, I procured all the key ingredients from Qoo10 (dried cuttlefish and frozen Korean oyster meat). Would you trust a company that suggests the perfect homecation would start with me unboxing a spin mop, and thereafter smiling beatifically as my helpful, well-behaved child and I undertook to mop the floor together?

Last week was super hectic at work, though I found it quite enjoyable, like old days. Because of it, I ended up having an unexpectedly heartfelt conversation on Saturday night with W, my old roommate, after I thought to tell her that I have over the years (and that is very many years, about 7 I would say) channeled the efficiency and focus she radiated the moment she barged into our room in the morning. I hated it at the time (of course), but I will always be grateful for the sense of discipline she helped instil through her exacting demands. The satisfaction and pride that the knowledge of a job well done brings cannot come about otherwise (though I can hear D snidely remark that it’s the competitiveness talking.)

But the week also reminded me, again, that it was right to have left so soon. I was snappier than usual with Jon and the boys, the fact of the matter being that when you’re both chionging, there just isn’t much, if anything, left for the kids or the household. The slack usually picked up by mothers is just left to… slack. And no matter what a wonderful learning experience! it is to realise that you cannot have or do it all blah blah blah [insert feel-good statements here], it’s just irritating AF when the slack is left to slack, like dishes being left too long in the sink, festering dirty laundry and tons of clean unfolded clothes, the eco-guilt of getting takeaway but really you cannot face cooking again….

The emails that need to be sent have been sent; no celebratory drinks by the river in these times (not that there were for a long time pre-CB anyway). These days the reward for the pleasant exhaustion is a book and a nap, maybe an episode of World of the Married...? I hope you are having a good public holiday.

#wfhdiaries Days 28-32

It dawned on me earlier this week that I am currently responsible for the boys’ vegetable intake. Prior to the CB I depended on childcare and to a lesser extent, grandmothers, to enforce vegetable consumption, so I knew the boys got at least one meal with vegetables a day. At home, Daniel kicks up a huge fuss if there is so much as a sliver of green in his food, and Andrew is at a stage where he just follows suit, so for most CB meals they’ve just eaten carbs and meat, and get their fibre from fruit and wholemeal bread. And, hopefully, Meiji biscuits (with oats – that’s the green coloured one). My mother is probably shaking her head as she reads this, but now she knows why we are all so vague in our responses during video calls. Are you eating vegetables? *giggles* *act cute* ok say bye to Popo.

The aforementioned epiphany struck when I realised that the big 32-pack box of Meiji biscuits with oats that I’d bought on Tuesday was more or less gone by Friday (each packet contains 7, I think Jon and I combined only ate 2 packets at the most, so by elimination you can guess where the others ended up). By Thursday, Daniel had already taken apart the box to make the beginnings of a “house” that has been torn down and is awaiting recycling.

M helpfully reminded me that there are “veggie” Meiji biscuits (tomato and assorted vegetables?), but I haven’t seen them anywhere recently; even the 32-pack boxes only made an appearance at my preferred NTUC on the day I purchased them. Perhaps other parents are facing the same dilemma as we are regarding vegetable consumption, though from what I can see on Instagram, it seems like everyone else’s pre-school children are more than thrilled to consume vegetables (but maybe those whose children are eating Meiji veggie biscuits in lieu of fresh vegetables aren’t posting about it, obviously not).

The theme of Daniel’s English/ Good Citizen class this past week was recycling. All well and good, but then 20 minutes before Andrew’s Chinese class a few days later I read the instructional email more closely (common theme, this. I confess to Nelsonian blindness on first readings) and realised that we needed two empty plastic drink bottles for the craft. We have not purchased drinks in plastic bottles for a very long time, and I wanted to tell laoshi that even if we had I’d have recycled them. Why isn't there a common theme across classes? So I ended up providing two take-out containers for the craft. Whatever floats your boat, right? 

Yes people it's a boat ok

Except that the boat also ended up getting taken apart before we could see whether it floated. Andrew’s English teacher has also sent me a message to ask me to send pictures or videos of Andrew’s “crafts” and any “work he has completed”. I sent her the  above photo of the boat, which she said she would forward to laoshi, and repeated her request, this time emphasising that she "needed" them, and adding cute thank-you stickers.

She can see the double blue ticks on that last smiling cat emoting a pink heart but I have not replied her. I suspect the stickers are her way of hiding how she really feels about the fact that I have allowed Andrew to, essentially, anyhow-ly with korkor, is my best friend! (Awwww.) After the Meiji biscuit with oats debacle, I realised that most afternoons Jon and I just ignore Them and really work, and we have no idea what They do. Or what Daniel does after Andrew finally deigns to nap (Mummy, I’m very tired, I want to lie down. *proceeds to moodily mooch at the window*). At least this past week we know he was consuming Meiji biscuits with oats.

Jon recently got through an intense period at work (well he’s still working intensely but the previous intensity was for a different reason) and so I felt more expansive this past week about the food we ordered. I went out on a limb and decided to try Artichoke’s Vietnamese deli set. It wasn’t mind-blowing, maybe because it was takeaway, but what it had going for it was that it was thoughtful and comforting. I appreciated how much they stuffed into the hoagie, and what they stuffed into the hoagie – the large, thinly-sliced pickles were a nice touch, just like how you would make them at home.

It was also the first time EVER that we tried anything from Artichoke (children, etc.). In fact I got lost searching for it, although we used to walk along that stretch of road back in uni when it was nice to stay out late and just walk around. We always called that yellow building the faux church.

I also took the plunge and ordered The Secret Mermaid’s all-day drink set. This was my third drink delivery from them during the CB (fourth if you count the drinks I sent to R). This CB is unleashing my inner alcoholic, except that I pass from the pleasant buzz to grumpy sleepyhead stage in less than half-an-hour, so perhaps it’s a bit of a waste. The drinks are excellent though, and they don’t stinge on the alcohol.

Frankly, I don’t think many of us will be going back to work in our respective offices any time soon (even after the CB is over) so for your reference, I leave you with a list of the best places we’ve dapao-ed or ordered take-out from this CB. Largely for the Clementi/Dover/Holland/West Coast area (one cannot cook all the time. Really. I love cooking but ---):

1. Nude Seafood (I drove down to collect it). Yes, it really is as good as it looks on your friend’s IG stories.
2. La Pizzaiola (Sime Darby). Currently 1-for-1. We usually order the four cheese pizza and spaghetti bolognese, and we finish it all in one meal. #carbs4lyfe
3. Blk 19A Dover Crescent kuey chap. The uncle collecting money and taking your order is grumpy AF but don’t be deterred. Order extra duck, you won’t regret it. The gravy is divine. Also at this coffeeshop: the best ice lemon tea in Singapore (price and taste wise, ask for siu dai, bring your own container), the shao la I ate a lot of when I was pregnant and therefore cannot eat so much of now.
4. 365youreverydayfood (Science Park).
5. Sunset Railway Café (down the row from Daily Scoop Sunset Way). Won’t deny it, we’re supporting the gentrification of our neighbourhood.
6. Sushi Tei. Nothing like a Rainbow Roll, no mayo.

#wfhdiaries Days 24-27

It has been a while since we’ve done any activity that required either Jon or me (usually me) to be the designated driver (“Designated Driver”). Not that we undertook many activities that required a Designated Driver before all this circuit breaking took place, especially after the boys came along. Jon used to say that he could probably still drive better than me even after he’d had a few drinks, not that this theory was or ever will be tested. It wasn’t that long ago I was sitting in the bowels of the TP building, signing minutes. The fate of a man, the power of a pen, and all that.

But far more important and enduring than the Designated Driver is the designated dishwasher (“Designated Dishwasher") (surprise, also me!). So imagine my consternation when Andrew sidled up and had the gall to solemnly inform me that I had to wash dishes like Papa, you know?, as he rubbed the palms of his hands together in imitation of Jon’s dishwashing. I suppose it has increased 100% compared to pre-circuit breaking days (1 to 2 represents a 100% increase), but the fact remains that as the Designated Dishwasher, even if I wash my hands off the dishes, I will still be washing my hands off the dishes. Instead, my nod to the customary Mother’s Day household chore concession was to only mop 2/3 of the house. Not that the last 1/3 mopped itself as part of the customary Mother’s Day do-goodery by one’s husband and children.

This past week, mothers all around Singapore were given the privilege of making a Mother’s Day craft with their child as part of HBL. Daniel, of course, interpreted Mother’s Day craft to mean that his mother should be the one assisting him in its creation, despite my pointing out to him that what this really meant was that his father should be doing so. But I got my own back when Teacher P asked what have we planned to do for mummy for Mother’s Day this weekend? by gleefully informing the assembled six and almost-six year olds and their accompanying parents (almost all fathers) that whatever we were doing, it would involve A L C O H O L. I kid, I kid, though I’ve probably had more cocktails in the past 3 weeks than in the past six years, thanks to delivery services and the fact that there is no need for a Designated Driver.

Teacher P replied Chloe, I thought Daniel was supposed to be making the flowers?  

I slunk off, properly chastened. But once the Zoom meeting ended, I finished the craft. Might as well make it pretty.

This morning, I got to enjoy almost 3 hours ALONE with a run and my favourite ice lemon tea because everyone else slept in (Jon splurged on aircon). Not a bad start to Mother’s Day at all.

   

#wfhdiaries Days 20-23

Keeping small children alive, the house in a livable condition (the cleaning lady hasn’t been coming, obviously, so the standard which constitutes a “livable condition” has unsurprisingly plunged dramatically) and having to decide, AGAIN, what we’re going to eat for dinner (and now lunch and sometimes breakfast), was exhausting before the CB started, and is still exhausting now. Who knew?

I finished my training plan for the cancelled Income Eco Run last week and took this week off running completely, which means I have spent an irrational amount of time fretting about how this will affect my Strava stats. Funnily enough, I had more motivation to keep to a plan when life was going on “as normal”. I peaked just before the CB started, and it was a struggle to get to the end, though I knew I would feel worse if I just called it quits. I ended the training cycle with a crappy time trial, which made me sad for a while, but overall I was just glad to have some closure and certainty during this unsettling time. It’s been a weird couple of days without getting outside for a run, but I made the discovery of the CB just last week: I can cast my phone screen to my TV screen without a Bluetooth dongle. It has made Les Mills On Demand workouts more fun; almost like being in a live class where you know exactly what joke the instructors are going to crack next.

Other family members have decided they would also like to do a spin class

On Monday, Daniel’s class had Show-and-Tell. The topic was “A Weekend With My Family”. What the kids were supposed to have done with their families over the weekend that didn’t involve TV and multiple naps eluded me, although when I read the email again I realised that they could talk about a weekend Before CB. It didn’t stop one of his classmates from happily chirping, “Last weekend, I watched TV and play phone!”, a perfectly acceptable way to spend a weekend these days. Teacher P’s response was disappointing but expected; she suggested that this kid tell her parents to read to her more. Daniel drew a picture showing him taking the bus to music class with Mummy and Andrew (I later wrote “I like taking the bus to music class with Mummy and Andrew” on a separate piece of paper for him to painstakingly copy onto his worksheet as I tried not to freak out that he is 6 this year and does not appear to know how to spell “I”.)

On Wednesday, I logged on to my work laptop bright and early and made sure my IM status was an optimistic, green, “Available”. I continue logging in as “Available” every weekday morning despite the fact that it is an untruth because it makes me feel like I am “Available” and actually doing what WFH Parents are supposed to do, namely, WFH. But right after that I usually go to the living room and turn on the family laptop to play the videos the boys were supposed to have watched a couple of days ago for that morning’s HBL. That day I also double-checked the timetable which I received at least a week ago and remembered that I blatantly ignored the fact that there was craft, because we have no craft materials – when you let two small boys muck around on their own around the house pretty much 90% of the time, you end up getting rid of a ton of craft stuff, otherwise the mess is unbelievable  (I collected all their oil pastels and stored them in a washed take-out container and put it in the storeroom after I spent a good part of the first CB weekend scrubbing oil pastel stains off the floor).

My mother thinks I should instil in them the good habit of Cleaning Up After Themselves. I agree, but am currently lacking the fortitude required to undertake this herculean task. In 5 years’ time I will be complaining about how no one helps around the house, and I will only have myself to blame.

I tried to start working but Andrew got really emo seeing all his friends and teachers on Zoom instead of in real life, so I allowed him to sit on my lap and look solemnly at the laptop screen while laoshi did her level best to engage a bunch of four/almost four year olds. I told her we didn’t have any construction paper and she said oh, any kind of paper will do, which is when I remembered the stack of old Economists lying around. Andrew snapped out of his emo-ness long enough to create a craft from an article about the future of artificial intelligence and a hastily retrieved roll of masking tape.

The theme was "traffic". I am available to clarify your interpretation of the craft.

During my trip to NTUC this week, I noticed that some enterprising member of their staff had brought in a whole bunch of assessment books for ages 5+ and up. I only threw the Spelling and Writing one into my germy cart which I was pushing without disposable gloves on before I realised that there were at least three other topics available, so I took one of each. Daniel is obsessed with writing the answers down as neatly and perfectly as possible, which means that he keeps erasing and re-writing and then I have to get out the vacuum cleaner to vacuum up all the eraser droppings. But I did have the foresight to replace our very old, on its last legs vacuum cleaner just before the CB started. We have the amazing Phillips PowerPro Expert 2100W, and I have to say, I have never enjoyed sucking things up more.

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See you next week.